Is it our capacity to endure? To bounce back from failure? Is it positivity in the face of adversity?

All too often, the discourse around resilience focuses on toxic positivity: hanging on, ‘toughing it out’ and being seen to be coping, even if we end up running on pure adrenaline.

Or we look internally, assuming that there is some kind of grit and determination we must find deep within ourselves at times of adversity. If we can’t find it within, it must be a personal failing.

Resilience – a team game

But according to research cited in Harvard Business Review, “resilience is not purely an individual characteristic, but is also heavily enabled by strong relationships and networks”.

People in our support systems can bolster our resilience by offering empathy, providing a sounding board, shifting our perspective or simply reminding us that we are not alone in facing the challenge.

Connecting with others

In short, resilience is not something we need to find deep down inside ourselves: connecting with others – and finding value in those connections – can make us more resilient in our most challenging times.

In a professional context, having a reliable and responsive network is not just about advancing your career, but also cultivating and maintaining meaningful connections with colleagues which sustain your emotional wellbeing in times of stress and difficulty.

We might have different needs to help bolster resilience. These might change depending on the particular challenge we face. But collectively, says Harvard Business Review, “the relationships we develop are a toolbox that we can turn to in our most difficult times”.

Seeking new connections

According to research, there are a number of relational sources of resilience which can be of benefit to us when faced with a challenge or difficulty.

When we are lacking a particular kind of connection that could build resilience, we need to broaden our network, look beyond like-minded individuals, and seek it out.

So, what are relational sources of resilience and where should we look for them?

How can we understand the strengths present in those around us? Being aware of preferred Belbin Team Roles – an individual’s tendency to behave, contribute and interrelate with others in a particular, predictable way – can help us understand the type of support those around us can provide.

• Empathy

An empathetic team member can allow us to express and release negative emotions. Those with Teamworker strengths are well placed here.

When things aren’t going well, talking about what isn’t working can lead the way to thinking about how best to fix it.

• “It’s only one data point”: maintaining perspective

We might be tempted to dismiss other contributions that don’t appear to be adding anything when the going is good.

A Monitor Evaluator’s (ME) perspective can add valuable balance. For example, when sales are going well, an ME could point out that it was only one month – one data point. But then when sales drop and despondency sets in, they can be the voice of reason once more, reminding the team that, again, it’s only one data point.

• Making sense of people and politics

A crisis often entails increased conflict. Not only are the stakes higher, but we don’t take the time to communicate as we might otherwise do.

Those with Co-ordinator strengths are often adept at handling ‘people politics’. They are skilled at using individual strengths and encouraging people to pull together, in pursuit of a shared purpose or objective.

• Shifting work and managing surges

In times of difficulty, we might not have the time for lengthy discussions to build consensus: there is a need for someone to call the shots and ensure that work is done.

That’s where the Shaper comes in. Shapers enjoy challenging environments and overcoming obstacles and can provide required direction.

• Diversity of approach

Sometimes all that is needed is a new approach to a complex problem. When stuck with the same thinking, a strong Plant is often the one to suggest a creative solution

which hasn’t occurred to anyone before.

Don’t go it alone

Resilience is not a solo endurance test.

Building a network around us – and knowing the sources of resilience within that network is key to fostering resilience in the face of adversity.

Author: Victoria Brown – Head of R&D,  Belbin Ltd

Find out more about understanding Belbin Team Roles here.

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As the days grow shorter, the blackout is coming.

It has been a brutal year. How do you and your people recharge your batteries?

I was so thrilled to find a jar  of Nutella lurking in the fridge (honest – it was nearly empty when I found it!!!). It wasn’t until I finished it, that I stopped to reflect and ask myself:

“why on earth did I think that was a good thing to do?”

Homeworking and poor posture had resulted in sciatica, I had spent 6 weeks standing up throughout all of my working days. I wasn’t able to exercise, or go for a walk with my husband in the evenings.

I couldn’t enjoy the simple things in life, including sitting down.  I was exhausted.

“It’s a weird, weird world.”

“So far, so good, thank goodness. How about you?”

These are my usual responses when I am asked how I am, how I am coping with Covid.

I realise in writing this, that my responses are part of my coping techniques, my “resilience mask” that I wear to protect me from the realities of our weird, weird world.

Every day, we do so many things unconsciously, without much, if any thought. Many of our habits are unconscious responses to what is happening around us.

So before daylight shrinks and blackout descends, take time to press your pause button, to consciously identify the habits and techniques that help you through each day. Capture your answers to the following question:

1. When the going gets tough, how do I cope? How do I respond to remain energised and productive?

(Tip: Create your list over a week or so. Be honest with yourself, capture all your habits, the good and the not so good habits)

2. Reflect on your list. Using different colours, highlight the good and the not so good habits.

As an example, here are some of mine:

My good habits: sleeping well; waking energised and raring to go; working on the big important topics first while my energy is high; taking breaks, going for a walk; doing my back exercises; singing – loudly;  looking at photos that bring me joy; client/volunteer work to achieve a positive difference; speaking to and connecting with people, eating healthy food………

My not so good habits: broken sleep; eating lots of chocolate; eating when not hungry; listening/reading too much bad news; avoidance, taking too long to start something that has to be completed; withdrawing; working long hours; concern about Covid and its impact …..

3. Your good, helpful habits are those that help you recharge your batteries and build your resilience. These are the habits to continue to consciously recognise and add to your list throughout blackout. This is the list you reach for when the going gets tough.
4. Your not so good, unhelpful habits are your warning signals. Too many of these in one day and your resilience disappears fast. Be aware, be alert, grab your list of helpful habits and quickly re-charge your batteries by doing one of them.

So when you find me singing loudly, you know I am polishing my “resilience mask” to boost my positive energy and productivity.  I am lucky, I have developed these habits over the years.  I also know to give myself permission to remove my mask. To let go and wallow when needed, in the knowledge that I can manage my resilience  (view our 2 minute resilience video). I can bounce back and take back control.

Key tips:

• Focus your energy on what you can control to consciously manage your resilience.
• Avoid wasting time and energy on what on what you can’t control, you are adding to your stress levels, reducing your resilience as a result.
• Share this with your team to start these conversations. Build on these conversations so that you can recognise your own warning signals and those of others. Your warning signals sometimes need to be held up in your mirror by others for you to see. Share your helpful habits so that you can learn from each other and support each other through the winter months ahead.

Finally:

How much time do you invest in you to reflect on how you need to adapt your way of working to be the best version of you in life?

Executive Coach Fiona Anderson is a Change Catalyst, Facilitator and Executive Coach. Fiona has extensive experience and expertise, rooted in the belief that people grow business.

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